Feel like I checked into Rehab, Baby You're my Disease

I want to explore my sexual past
At last
I asked
To find the gloom my spirits surpassed
The way I sent my mind away
to play
to dream of better days
just to keep the screams at bay

It's time to let my soul purge
the surge
that sends that overpowering crying urge,
but you wanna be a dramaturge
you're quick to say
that day to day
I have so many roles to play
to you, to him, to myself, to the world
to be a lovely little girl
white, blue eyes, blonde billowing curls

I must keep quiet and please my man
if I can
to be as valuable as his land
to never inquire about the plans
or his commands
to keep me in the palm of his hands
I'm his to hold
do what I'm told
or I'll be out in the cold
where I may be sold
body, not soul
living under another man's control

or choose to rebel
to excel
to find my voice to storytell
"my body is not yours to sell"
"your urges are not mine to quell"

If I run I sleep with eyes
open wide
who's by my side?
When I get caught, he'll tan my hide
and seek out ways to take my pride
but that's inside.
Should I confide?
About nights I cried?
How it felt like my spirit died?
about how I tried
To turn the tide?
to get the law upon my side?
since it's their word by which I abide
but next thing I know, I was tried

On the stand
in this "great land"
being judged "my fellow man"
about my outfit and my plans
where did I let him put his hands?
did he really make demands?

Was it yes or no?
or maybe so?
I'm just a ho
I slept with Joe
does that mean Johnny gets a go?
"You said no...
How can we know?
You can't prove it, let it go
You wore a shirt and your breasts showed.
You didn't struggle, he went slow."

"You should know better than to let him in your home
to be alone
to wear cologne
to set down your telephone
you should know because you're grown"

Yes means yes,
No means yes
She's just playing hard to get
if signals mix take a guess
Gentleman, place your bets
How does she like it best?

It's a sickness and a crime
to be a woman of this time
with a spine
with a mind
to be kind
to unwind.

It's a sickness or a crime
to tell a story that is mine
to use courage as a sign
of healing, feeling and the divine
connecting to what's left inside
crying as we press rewind
share our struggles of many kinds
we take each other back in time

The pain is what destroys yet binds
we could dull it with moonshine
we could read between the lines
which, in darkness, can be hard to find
but if you run, it's right behind

When it catches up your voice quakes
your mind aches
and your heart breaks
but you always have a hand to take
to pick you up when you break
to hold you steady when you shake
to give your aching spirit a break
It's your smile to fake
and your word is all we can take

Your feelings are yours to feel
your wounds are yours to heal
you pride is no one's to steal
your pain is real
your secrets are yours to reveal
your lies are yours to conceal
we're still here and our lips are sealed

Tell your story , it's okay to be scared
Let judgements be spared
You won't be compared
Your beauty and your battles are yours to share.